Tears when I went to bed, tears when I woke in the morning. Hoping that it’s not real but feeling the weight that it is.

I was pre-destined to be a Laker fan, you see my older brother was a huge fan of Magic Johnson & the Showtime era. But it was different with me & Kobe. There’s the average fan that knows the stats, the highlight reel‘s…And then there’s the fans like me. The ones that become obsessive just as much as he was. The walking Kobe encyclopedias. I don’t think there was a day that went by growing up that I didn’t mention some stat, or say something he said. I’d get into arguments with people, over how he was the GOAT. Yes, I was saying that even then. If you ask one of my college professors, I even wrote a whole speech in my writing class about why he should win the MVP, & he would go on to win it that next year.

January 10, 2006. He played the Portland Trailblazers. My family had a tradition of going to the hotels to try to get signatures because decades prior my brother had done so & met Magic. Who went on to give the family a phone call! Which is another story…But I was obsessive with Kobe & my mom knew my one goal in life was to meet this man that my world revolved around. At the time, was when Kobe was going through a lot of turmoil off the court, so he was known not to sign anything or speak to anyone. But he walked out of that hotel room, took one look at me (even though there was at least 50 people standing there) & came to sign everything I had in my hands & got on the bus. I walked into school later that day, walking on cloud 9.

I watched him in awe for so long. I wanted to mimic everything about him. His habits, mannerisms, even right down to his free through routine. It’s bittersweet to me that I realized, at 31 years of age in my classroom, & he at 41 with his multi-million dollar companies, we were focusing on the same passion…inspiring the next generation, knowing they were the future who could change the world. So, as I write this with tears in my eyes, he really did become a part of me. It feels like a part of me died, but if anything it strengthened, Mamba Mentality forever.

It was an honor to pour every ounce of my support into a player…& a person, like him. To know a person’s life has its ups & downs, but that you can push past anything you set your mind to. I used to say I’ve been there since the beginning, & I’ll be there til the end. But I’ll be there after the end. They’ll write books about him, & someday in the future, I’ll share the story with the next generation, of how a man, because of sheer will power, changed the world. 💜💛

Photo credit: Noah Graham